Love Letter in the Drawer

Hi Mary Jie
Hearing Evonne's love letter to her Wai Po, made me have the urge to write this to my Wai Po who left us since 27 January 2010 at 4am. Apologise for writing in English instead of Chinese and thanks for spending time to translate.

I still remember when young, Wai Po always will sewed each of us(grandchildren) pyjamas. The cloth will be choosen by us. We will follow her go market to choose the cloth with bears. She will spend her morning everyday sewing for us. But as time goes by, we already not getting her to sew for us. We will buy those ready made. Now if can choose again, I would like to wear those that she sewed for us.

My Wai Po was a great cook too. I remember she will always ask me drink more soups whenever I visited her on Sunday. I guess she is looking forward for every Sunday to arrive. As we will spend whole afternoon with her, hear her talk past stories and see her sewed pyjamas. Ever since she had stroke, I never get to taste her soups. Now whenever I stop by soup stalls, I will remember her soup taste and every time she would asked me to have 2nd and even 3rd bowls. I guess it was all Cantonese's favourites to cook soups for all meals.

I still remember when I first came in contact with what senile means was when she left the house one day and went missing for days. She was later found by police at Chinatown when they spotted her loitering outside with no identification documents. As police reports were made and photo of hers was being sent to islandwide police station, hence it made locating us easier. When we learnt of this, it was already 2nd day of her missing. We were all relieved when we heard she was already found unhurt. I even wished I am able to went out and find her myself.

We all thought she was only senile and did not knew later she will have stroke twice which made her lost her sight, hearing and speaking. She was being transfered to medical centre after her first stroke. We will visit her every Sunday. Although we knew no matter how we tried, she can never hear us, see us and even speak to us after her second stroke. Seeing her with tube inserted to her nose for feeding, I cried. Can I ask for a healthy Wai Po again? Can I ask her cook for me soups, made me pyjamas? Can I?

Few months ago, she was hospitalised due to fever and breathing difficulties. Later we were told that all her organs were spoilt and she needs to put on oxygen masks if we want her to live. Once the tube was removed, she will be gasping for air. The last Sunday when we visited her, she was breathing very hard. At that moment, my mum and I knew her days were numbered. She was lying at the bed for 11years till 27 January 2010, 4am, she had fever and passed away in her sleep. So peaceful yet so sudden. It was 4 days before my birthday and 1 day before my uncle's. It all happened too sudden that I wish it was all dreams.

The reason why I writing this letter is to tell my Wai Po this:
"Wai Po, althought you left us suddenly, we are still learning how to cope with your lost. Remember 30th January 2010, 10am, you were pushed to be cremented. We all cried. I know you do not wish we be sad over your departure. I also promise you to get over it soon. I will and will live happily under your protection. I cannot call you back to life. So I shall live for your love, care and concern. No matter what, you will always be in my heart. Never will I forget you, your pyjamas and your soup taste. May you be able to reunite with Wai Gong and live happily ever after. If there is next life, I would want to be your granddaughter once again and wear the pyjamas made by you. Drink the soups cooked by you. Wai Po, may you rest in peace"

(Hopefully, when this letter being read out, I will not cry and will feel happy for her to be out of pain and suffering. She was having good life to live till 91 years old with 12 grandchildren sending her off. I will not weeped for her lost anymore. I will be strong and walk out of sorrow. Sincerely thank all those who consoled me during this difficult period.)

Elaine